“…But on the other hand we hold that the new status will prove to be the worst kind of communism. The relations between the sexes, now so carefully guarded by religion and by parents, by law and by society, will become common and therefore corrupt. The family, the foundation of the state, will disappear…
The marriage tie will be weakened, and separation recurred to as an ordinary remedy. It is even probable that the duration of the bond will finds its limitation in expediency, and the marriage contract be assumed for limited periods, or for other purposes….”(1)
Next month the Supreme Court of the United States will hear gay marriage cases and decide upon gay marriage as a “constitutional right.” As much as I am opposed to the idea that two homosexual couples can actually be “married,” I hope that the Court will rule it as a constitutional right.
Yes, you heard me right. I hope the Court strikes down gay marriage bans as unconstitutional.
I hope gay marriage goes nationwide. It’s not like it could possibly do any more damage to the marriage institution anyways. The institution of marriage was pretty much destroyed years ago, with legal marriage only offering a few “benefits” to those who enter into what used to be a permanent and binding covenant between a man and a woman sanctioned by law, religion and custom.
The conservative case against gay marriage will be weak. What will the Right do? Throw the Bible at them? They’ll just be branded as bigots in the throes of religious dogma. Say it destroys the rights of children? It’s not like children aren’t already being raised in a whole host of non-family arrangements based upon “anything goes” legal policies and whatever contract adults choose to make with each other. Family ties are already so weak, “blended” and “rotational” that a few gay couples here and there raising kids probably won’t even be noticed.
Marriage used to have real and true meaning but not anymore. Marriage used to be an institution that safeguarded a father’s rights and the security of women and children. But now a man by default has the same rights and responsibilities to children fathered via a drunken one-night stand with a woman who is a complete stranger as he does within legal marriage. He can walk in or out of rights and responsibilities at his own whim and few women can expect to be provided for by husbands anymore.
Marriage used to be about men financially providing for women and children, but not anymore. Most women today enter into relationships with boy-men who become financially dependent upon them. Nearly half of all men have wives and live-in girlfriends who are better educated and have a better paying job than they do. Marriage was already bastardized a long time ago to hold both spouses jointly responsible for all debts, financial matters and decisions made in the family. Alimony, where for centuries a husband was required to provide for a wife for a lifetime, has now been reduced to some kind of gender-neutral and temporary “spousal support” and nothing more.
Marriage today has so little legal meaning that a marriage license is barely even worth the paper it’s printed on. It’s not about a man coming forward and calling upon a woman, of making his intentions to court her known and taking her under his wing and providing for her in the honorable state of marriage for a lifetime.
Marriage today is barely more “honorable” than just moving in together. Today men can expect to be able to live with a girlfriend for a while and, if they get “serious” enough about each other (or happen to have a few kids together) they might get married later. His girlfriend will split the bills with him and he gets free sex.
Now a man takes a woman as his wife and she helps him pay the rent and helps provide for him. And, oh yeah, he gets to have sex with her (if she’s in the mood, of course. If she’s not then he becomes the all-maligned “marital rapist”). A man can expect to gain with marriage these days a roommate that helps him pay the bills.
So what is marriage about? It’s not a permanent commitment. Either party can walk away whenever. It’s not a covenant. The vows don’t mean much as a person’s word isn’t worth anything these days. Pretty much anything that comes out of a person’s mouth these days is all BS until proven to be true. It’s not about raising children. Most children aren’t even raised within legal marriage with both parents in an intact and stable family unit. It’s not about paternity. It’s not a requirement for respectable sex. Is it about love? romance? insurance benefits? commitment?
There’s nothing sex-specific about “love” and “commitment” is there? So why, then, cannot anyone marry? After all a person can feel “love” for someone of the same sex and people have all kinds of sexual fetishes. It’s all just a personal and private thing between “two consenting adults” so why not have gay marriage?
Indeed, why not?
The foundation of marriage has been chipped away at for so long there’s barely anything left. Maybe the only way change can happen is by allowing gay marriage; by completely demolishing what’s left of the broken, chipped, cracked, weathered and destroyed foundation. Maybe only then will the institution completely collapse. Maybe only then can a social revolution occur to rebuild the foundation of marriage and restore it to it’s former meaningful and respected position in society. Maybe only then will things have gotten so bad and gone so far down that the only way to go is up. Maybe only then can the old fade away and a new beginning be possible.
So I say bring the popcorn and the beer and let’s get on with the show…
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B. A. Hunter 